Return of the Runebound Professor
Chapter 385: We all get hungry

“We are anything but friends,” the large apostle spat. “I don’t know why you’re here, Revin, but this is the only warning you’re going to get. Leave.”

“Anything?” Revin arched an eyebrow. “Don’t tell me you’re already ready for the next step. I’m not sure I can see you as anything more than a friend, though. I’m afraid I’ll have to refuse.”

“Out of my way, Revin.”

“Oh, it’s just my luck that you’re the one that comes bumbling along my way,” Revin said with an exasperated sigh. “Why couldn’t it have been someone interesting? How’s Garina these days, Audren? She was always fun.”

“She never recovered after the damage you did to her,” Audren said. “She had so much potential, and you ruined it by turning her into a nutjob, just like yourself. Step down. I’m on a mission from the Master himself, and that means I’m allowed to cut right through you if I need to.”

“You?” Revin exclaimed, taking a step back. “Cut through me? Oh, no. I don’t think that’s very likely. How long has it been since we last saw each other, Audren?”

“Not long enough.”

“I won’t disagree with that answer, but I believe you’ve skirted the question. If I’m being honest, I’ve forgotten myself. I don’t tend to remember people that don’t draw much of my interest, and the only reason you even got a spot in my memory is because of those lovely sounds your body makes when I slam it against walls. You could never beat me, Audren. Not then, and not now.”

“You used to be a real threat,” Audren said, reaching back to the large axe on his back. He hoisted it at his side, baring his teeth in challenge. “But not anymore. You couldn’t handle the power that the Master gave us. It broke your weak mind and burned what remained of it away like kindling.”

Revin glanced down at himself, then back up at Audren. “I’m right here, you know. If I burned away, would I really be standing around wasting a perfectly good day by speaking to a walking bag of rocks?”

“You got your warnings,” Audren snarled. His body blurred as six streamers of black smoke erupted from him, streaking out through the air. Revin brought his scythe down, carving the smoke apart before it could reach him.

“I really do hope you’ve learned to do more than that in the time since we last had the misfortune of meeting,” Revin drawled, spinning the scythe and driving its butt into the ground. “Because that was disappointing, Audren. I already don’t expect much from you, but it’s been years since I left your group. If I’m being honest, the costumes were a bit too much for me. I mean, come on. Dressing up in dark clothes and meeting in caves? How can you say I’m the one that’s insane when you manage to make the Church of Repose look legitimate?”

Audren wasn’t goaded so easily, but the flurry of axe swings he unleashed on Revin had considerably more anger behind them than they needed. Every single strike whistled harmlessly past Revin as he stepped around, his lips pursed in disappointment.

“The others will thank me when I take your head.” Audren’s axe hummed with power as he lunged, narrowly missing Revin as the other man stepped out of the way again.

“The others will thank you when you take a bath,” Revin replied. “Or perhaps you just forgot to wash your costume. You know, if you want to be all secretive, shouldn’t you meet in really plain clothes in a plain building? Nobody would ever suspect that. Now, a bunch of hooded mushroom eating idiots? That’s definitely a cult.”

“Why are you here?” Audren screamed. His axe split apart, dozens of afterimages carving through the air with keening howls. The grass all around them was carved to shreds and the earth collapsed, falling out from under the pressure of Audren’s domain.

“Is that really all you can do?” Revin asked with a wry smile. “Or are you restricted? You can’t use your full force, can you? Worried that Garina will come spank you if she realizes that a Rank 7 is strolling around in her domain?”

“Garina is one of the Apostles,” Audren snapped. “She’s on my side, not yours.”

“If you’re so sure about that, why aren’t you using more power?” Revin asked. “You’ve attacked me with nothing that a Rank 4 couldn’t have done. As a matter of fact, I know a Rank 4 that could probably do it better. Maybe two.”

Audren ground his teeth. His eyes flicked around the clearing, clearly searching for some form of escape, but wherever they landed, Revin seemed to stroll into view a second later. It wasn’t like Revin was omnipotent – he just seemed to know exactly wherever Audren was going to look before he did.

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“Are you this dead set on interfering with our duties?” Audren asked. “Even if you can hold me off, do you really believe you could hold off all of the Apostles when they come for you in retaliation for standing in the way of our holy mission?”

“Is that what you’re calling it now? I kind of figured you liked getting bossed around by a mysterious figure. You know, I figure I could probably do that. If I put on a cloak and tell you to get lost, will you do it?”

“You dare disrespect the Master?” Audren asked. “I am no fool, Revin. I know your mouth runs like a river to distract your opponents – but are you really stupid enough to believe you can stand against a god?”

Revin heaved a sigh. The grin fell away from his face and he leaned against his scythe. “Audren, for old times’ sake, I’ll give you one honest answer in the form of another question. Do you really think this Master gives a shit about you? I mean, I don’t blame him. He gets free labor. Who says no to that?”

“He gives us power! You’re nothing without the Rune he gave you,” Audren said. “If it wasn’t for his mercy, you’d be a crippled husk by now. I suspect he just enjoys watching your antics, but he specifically ordered that I kill two weaklings – weaklings that I suspect you are stopping me from getting to.”

“Look at that. You can get smarter,” Revin said with an overexaggerated nod. “Good job.”

Audren’s axe carved through the air, whistling harmlessly past Revin once more. Revin stepped past the considerably larger man, rapping him on the back of the head with his scythe.

“Stop with your delay tactics!” Audren demanded. “Fight me or leave. This is ridiculous. We are not children.”

“Funny you say that. If you don’t start taking this fight seriously, you’re going to die,” Revin said. “It’s time to make up your mind. Either commit to your god given orders and use those powers that you’re hiding – prove that your Master really did order you here, and what do you have to lose? Against both you and Garina, I’m sure I’d struggle.”

Audren grit his teeth, and Revin’s grin grew wider.

“Unless you’re concerned that Garina would turn against you. Or are you more worried that she won’t show up at all?”

“She’ll show up,” Audren said. “She always does. It’s the one damn thing she held onto from before joining us, and not even the Master could get her to stop. It’s a waste of time, but she’s obsessed with it.”

“That’s because she’s smarter than you are,” Revin said. “Last chance to turn around and walk away, big man.”

“Eat shit.”

“Ah, well,” Revin said. “Can’t say I didn’t try.”

***

“What am I watching?” Renewal asked in disbelief, staring at the fight – if it could be called that – playing out on the rippling image before her and Decras.

“Revin,” Decras replied. It was impossible to tell if the tone of his voice was annoyed, impressed, or a mixture of the two. “He was one of mine, at one point. One of the strongest.”

“Something tells me that isn’t true anymore. He doesn’t seem to think much of you. Maybe he should join up with me.” Renewal snickered.

“He’d rip your church apart from the inside,” Decras said. “And you’re right. Revin is mad. Audren wasn’t wrong about that.”

“He doesn’t seem mad. Just annoying. Driving your enemy up a wall in a fight is a perfectly valid strategy,” Renewal observed. “I wouldn’t say it’s a respectable one, but it’s a strategy nonetheless.”

“Does anything you see right now look even remotely sane to you?” Decras asked.

Renewal turned back to the screen. Audren was stumbling around, swinging his axe and shouting obscenities at nothing. Revin sat on a rock about a hundred feet away from him, his chin resting in his palm and a bored expression on his face.

He hadn’t moved once from that spot. Not once had Audren actually spoken to his real form, and the answer was the very same one that Revin had been pushing Audren to take. Revin’s domain was out – and in full force.

Invisible energy wove out from him in a huge globe, working into every single thing around him. Revin hadn’t ever pulled his domain back. He was strolling around with it practically pouring out power at such an intense wavelength that a lesser mage wouldn’t have even noticed it – but Garina certainly should have.

“Garina is choosing to ignore him?” Renewal asked, her eyebrows lifting. “She made an exception?”

“It’s not that Garina chose to make an exception,” Decras said. “She didn’t have a choice. Revin has long since twisted himself into something that he should not be. Just like Noah to you, Revin is my own experiment gone awry. One that may bear fruit one day, but for the time being, does nothing but annoy me.”

“All of your Apostles have some of your energy,” Renewal said with a shrug. “That’s not really that much of a surprise.”

“You don’t understand.” Decras shook his head. “Yes, the Apostles have some of my power – but Revin doesn’t. Not anymore.”

Audren’s eyes went wide. He doubled over, coughing violently and clutching at something invisible in his chest.

“Revin got rid of the magic you gave him?” Renewal blinked in surprise. It was rare to find a mortal that would actually throw power away in exchange for freedom, but there was a lot to respect there. “That’s actually quite interesting.”

Audren spun, running in the opposite direction as fast as he could without drawing enough power to pull Garina’s attention.

“Revin didn’t get rid of it,” Decras said, as if the words were bitter in his mouth.

Renewal pulled her eyes away from Audren, frowning. “What are you talking about?”

“The magic. He didn’t get rid of it.”

“What did he do, then?”

“The annoying bastard consumed it.”

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